Journal Entry: Saturday, May 22, 2021 Happy Birthday to my dear husband, Paul Kwasniewski, who would be 74 years old today. I wish he were out here on the back porch sitting next to me. If he were still alive, we probably would have gone out to breakfast and planned to share dinner with the girls and Joe and his family. As it is, Em and I talked about sharing dinner while writing down the many quirky sayings he often used that reflected his great sense of humor and made us laugh, and all the more now in his absence. It has been more than four years since he left us. When people ask me how grief affects my life now, the best response I can offer is that the overall malaise that hovered like a dense cloud cover on an otherwise sunny day has lifted. But grief still comes…
A eulogy for my father
Following is the eulogy I wrote and presented at my father’s funeral on December 7, 2019. Although it was written to be spoken, I hope you can hear the tone with which it was delivered. My father, Joseph Amicangelo, was born on January 14, 1922, in the small village of Pacentro in the Abruzzo region of Italy. He was the youngest of four children born to his parents, Caesare Amicangelo and Carolina Lalama. He is the brother of the late Carlo Amicangelo, Philomena Pompeo and Louis Amicangelo. He was married to my mom, the late Rose Petix, for 61 years. His devoted daughters include Linda (Ismael) Rodriguez, Laura Thurman, Carolina (Franco) Greco, and me, JoAnn (the late Paul Kwasniewski) Amicangelo. He was the proud grandfather of Angela (Anthony) Maicki, Jennifer (Jamie) Thiede, Marisa Greco, Matthew Rodriguez, Zachary (Katie) Amicangelo, Lisa (Steve) Nazoyan, Rachel Rodriguez, Gino Greco, Emilie Kwasniewski and Elise…
Ash Wednesday marks the season of Lent
Today the Christian Church observes Ash Wednesday. It marks the start of the season of Lent, a time for somber reflection – on our sin, our mortality, and our Savior. Strange as it may sound to some, I always look forward to Lent as an opportunity to open myself to God in a more intentional or different way. The idea of putting myself in a position to nourish my faith or discover new insights about my life in Christ gives new energy to my one-on-one time with God. More than that, I think my enthusiasm for this season is because it is the 40-day run up to Easter. And Easter – the celebration of Christ’s resurrection – is the basis for my faith. If Christ didn’t arise from the dead, then He wasn’t who He said He was, and, as the Apostle Paul wrote, “our faith is worthless” (I Cor…
Elise and Abby’s European adventure
A week ago today, it was Blue Monday, supposedly the most depressing day of the year. But, with meteorologists predicting lots of snow today and sub-zero temperatures with the wind chill this week, I’m thinking we all could use a little cheering up. So, today we’re heading to sunny Italy, albeit vicariously, with my daughter, Elise, and her best friend, Abby. The two spent about six weeks there last spring on a study abroad trip for Elise with the University of Michigan-Dearborn, and some fun in the sun for Abby. University of Padua When Elise wasn’t in classes at the University of Padua — the 800-year-old university where Galileo studied and taught — the two explored the incredibly beautiful sights and vibrant culture of Italy. They visited Venice, Florence, Assisi, Cinque Terra, Milan, Rome, Sorrento and Naples. They even flew to Berlin, Germany, to spend a weekend there. Take a…
Happy Birthday, Poppy
My dad turned 97 today. Most people who learn how old he is can’t believe it. He’s aged well, as they say, and still has a bigger-than-life personality that keeps him engaged in his world. And, let’s face it, he’s as handsome as ever. 97 years young I often tell him that he’s longer lasting than the Energizer bunny. I can’t tell you how many times in the last 10 years that my sisters and I thought we’d lost him to one health issue or another as we kept vigil with him in the emergency room. But it was never long before he’d come back around, and we’d breathe a sigh of relief. Sometimes he wonders aloud why God doesn’t take him to heaven to be with my mom. As much as his lament tugs at my heart, I can imagine what he must feel. It can’t be easy for…
For freedom or greed: A Veterans Day reflection
In honor of Veterans Day, I set out to write an article about my father’s brief stint in the army. He was 20 in 1943 when the call came to serve his country during World War II. Just three years before, he left Pacentro, Italy, to join his father and other family members in Pennsylvania and Michigan. Like his fellow immigrants, he came with the hope of a better, more prosperous lifestyle than he might have had in his hometown. Fortunately for my dad, he never saw a battleground. He did his basic training at Camp Custer in Michigan and Camp Robinson in Arkansas. Due to stomach ulcers that kept him in the infirmary more than on duty, he was granted a medical discharge six months later. But not every soldier was that lucky. While doing some research about Veterans Day, I found a list of the 11 wars or…
Silence is the language of God
A couple of weekends ago, I attended a women’s retreat with more than 80 others at St. Paul of the Cross Retreat and Conference Center in Detroit. I’ve been on several self-directed, silent retreats before, where, believe it or not, I did not speak for more than 40 hours from Friday evening to Sunday afternoon. This retreat was different. It had an agenda which included prayer services, teaching from various speakers, and mass. We were expected to remain silent only between the planned sessions. At meal times we were free to let loose, and, man, did we ever. The cafeteria was anything but silent! Why all the silence, you ask? Silence is the language of God Most mystics and contemplatives would say that if you want to hear from God, you must shut your mouth and listen. God can and does communicate with us in many ways. We might hear God’s…
Becoming a registered nurse fulfills childhood dream
I’m happy to tell you Emilie graduated from Schoolcraft College’s nursing program in May and passed her state licensing boards three weeks later. She is officially a Registered Nurse. Cue the applause! I don’t even know how to explain adequately what I feel about her achievement. I am proud, happy and, frankly, relieved. Getting into and surviving a nursing program is not easy. There’s the minimum grade point average requirement and the wait for your turn to begin the program. Emilie is smart as a whip, but she had to up her game to get the grades. She took pharmacology twice to get a passing grade, requiring her to wait a full year to get back into the program’s rotation of classes, which turned out to be just two weeks after her dad died. The volume of material covered is daunting. Study time leaves little room for much else and…
Celebrating his birthday when he’s gone
I woke up yesterday morning with pain in my sinuses and an ache in my jaw. I knew if I didnt get up and take some medication right then, a full-blown headache would soon knock me down for the count. With my eyes barely open, I shuffled into the kitchen to swallow two Excedrin capsules. I grabbed some ice packs from the freezer for my neck and head and shuffled back to bed. Still groggy from not enough sleep the night before, it took me a while to figure out what day it was. Tuesday, May 22. Pauls birthday. Id been anticipating the day ever since I turned the calendar over to May. Or was it the month before when I wished he was here to celebrate my birthday with me? Yet, in all that time, I hadnt thought about what Id do on his special day. I mean, what…
Dad’s passion for music brings healing
While having dinner a few weeks ago with my editor friend, Leslie, I told her about the impromptu concert my dad gave to residents on his floor the night before. Still awed by what I’d witnessed, I explained how his passion for music impacted a woman who suffers from dementia. I couldn’t hide my excitement as I described how his big heart and booming voice were transforming the retirement community he now calls home. Leslie thought the story would be perfect for her client’s website. She was working with them to prepare a bank of articles around the healing power of the arts. My dad’s story would demonstrate music’s potential to restore a measure of health to the elderly. I wrote the story the next day, and it was published at Ford Better World yesterday. I can’t wait for you to read it here. Secret to a long life My sisters and…